So you’re sitting in Page Auditorium beside the Duke Chapel beginning to question your presence here. You’re surrounded by Duke assholes and what seems to be an abnormally large amount of people who have never even been to a concert before. You know what I’m talking about here. That enormous group of people that have heard “Fidelity” on the radio (or “On the Radio” on the radio) and decided to go to the Regina Spektor show. Twenty seven dollars for a ticket and that five bucks you had to pay to park; that’s a pretty good chunk of change for a college student (a NC State student, not Duke). Row S sounded pretty good when you bought the ticket online, but now you find that you are at the back of the auditorium and underneath the balcony, which means every sound the obnoxious groups of girls to your right makes will be amplified. Oh, and there is no way your camera will be able to take pictures from here, which will probably come as a shock to readers (are you out there?) of your stupid little website who probably see your Flickr stream and think you have a camera permanently attached to your hand. Besides, Regina just had to cancel a bunch of shows with an inner-ear infection that developed into vertigo, so who knows if she will even be able to perform?

Eventually, a guy with an acoustic guitar strolls onto the stage. Only Son, he calls himself. He’s pretty good, in fact. Wait, did he just reference “City Slickers 2″? Yes, he did. Wait, have you really seen that movie? You have? Wow, that’s sad. Now he is recommending that everyone try taking LSD while naked inside the Duke Chapel. He does not have a full band with him, so he hooks his iPod up to the PA. He has a conversation with his iPod (it talks back), and then goes into his full band numbers (accompanied by the iPod). He sounds a great deal like a Grandaddy rip-off. You have no problem with this. He treats himself to Jack Daniels as a reward for finishing a song. You are fairly impressed as he finishes his set, and actually contemplate buying his album at the merchandise table. That is when you realize that you really don’t have any cash thanks to that somewhat unexpected parking fee. The lights are back up now and people seem to be getting frustrated. After another concert or two they will hopefully realize that shows very rarely start on time, and set changes are always long.

Finally, the auditorium goes dark. Everyone screams as this frail little Jewish girl from the Bronx strolls slowly onto the stage and up to the microphone. She opens with a gentle acapella number and then sits down at the grand piano where she will spend the rest of the evening. No backup band, no drum machine, no DJ. After a while you start to feel like this is the way her records should be. When her voice crescendos it rings through every inch of the auditorium, and any remaining chatter in the audience stop. Suddenly, everyone is transfixed. She rolls into “On the Radio” to appease the MTV segment of the audience, and then seems to gather herself. She answers each round of applause with a squeaky “Thank you.” Cute is really the only fitting description here. She is clearly feeling the affects of her recent illness, and announces that she will be sticking to the slow songs at this point. “I’m going to sit here for just a minute if you guys don’t mind. You can sit too.” You wonder how hard it must be to play piano and sing with vertigo. After toughing it out through about half her set, she has to be helped off the stage. Some of the lights go back up.

Spektor’s voice comes from off stage announcing that Jack Dishel (Only Son) will be returning to the stage to entertain while she tries to recover. It would be safe to assume that Dishel celebrated the conclusion of his set with some heavy drinking, and he decides to dance for the audience. “I came here as the guy who sings songs, but I’m going to leave as the crazy ****in asshole who dances.” Somehow he ends up running through some sort of stand up comedy routine, and is met with mixed reactions. Who would have thought that a date rape joke wouldn’t go over too well with some people at Duke these days? You think he is hilarious, but can sense the crowd getting impatient and are relieved when Regina appears from the side of the stage.

Grit. That is what Regina Spektor has. She is helped onto the stage by an assistant, and gently placed onto her piano bench. She finishes her set, playing many of your favorites (such as “Ghost of Corporate Future”) and closing with a fantastic cover of John Lennon’s “Real Love”. After each song she steadies herself and gives a thumbs up to someone backstage. At this point a good portion of the audience begins to stream out of the room, apparently failing to understand that if the house lights don’t come back up and the music doesn’t come on, that means she is willing to do an encore. Yes, an encore. She is helped onto the stage again, and finds the energy to play “Fidelity” and “Samson” before thanking the crowd again and being assisted away to hopefully rest. It is hard not to be impressed by such an effort, but Regina Spektor’s performance held up on its own tonight. There is an intensity and magic in her voice that is missing to a great degree on the slickly produced albums, and the live show is truly a unique experience. Just try to get a seat down front next time.